emotions

Deep Breaths

Posted on by haywiredthoughtsandstrokes

I read somewhere recently that deep breaths are like tiny love notes for your heart. Since the time I read it, I have started feeling the same. Why miss an opportunity of sending some love to your heart?

It helps me perform better, feel relaxed, calm my mind and de-stress. Sometimes I wonder if it’s all because of that quote which landed on my feed when I least expected it. I might never have gone into depth and acknowledged the impact of deep breath if I had scrolled by.

What if?

Our lives are saturated with ‘what if’s’ and that is something I earnestly detest. The feeling of not knowing, the feeling that keeps me wondering up at night when the music can no longer numb my thoughts. It’s something my mind goes after leading my heart astray.

There’s confusion everywhere, and without even trying to make sense of the madness I’d rather stop, stop myself from thinking too much, stop myself from the inevitable, stop myself from taking control and finally, stop myself for a deep breath.

After all this while, who knows what if, the heart truly deserves it?

Let it go, one breath at a time.

Almost Twenty

Posted on by haywiredthoughtsandstrokes

Transition. A word whose impact can be seen everywhere. Inside, outside and within oneself. Every day, hour, minute and second. Is it really happening? for all I can assume is, its just what is being seen. Is it just me? or is the world making us feel, realize and sense. Things are moving, everything is like the flow of a river, an unstoppable rush, inside its the adrenaline and outside its the wind, trying to play with my hair.

I recently watched the Truman Show and it broke my heart. As you grow older, you start to realise the importance of certain things. You get to know more about yourself; more than just how black you like your coffee. We are indeed being watched and speculated by the society around us. Can we question the system?

We blame the system and its rigidity. Unaware, of the consequences of an unsystematic society. The result of an unsystematic society would be that murders will take place on streets, in broad daylight. Rape victims would be in every house. Incest would be more popular than it is now. We will probably turn back to, where we came from.

Animals: wild. dangerous. free.

Going back to the title, I have started to realise that there now exist, bigger problems than not receiving a message back from that guy you like, getting a low grade in your last assignment or simply having no clothes to wear. Maybe we are disillusioned, or the world seems to be rotating at a pace equal to the Graham’s number but what we need to realise is, there is always something beyond. Life exists beyond our problems, whatever you are growing through today, you need to know, that there is a tomorrow, waiting for you. Calling you to hold on, not give up, because better days are on their way.

Artwork by Manukyan Inga

Looking for Alaska

Posted on by haywiredthoughtsandstrokes

“If people were rain, I was drizzle and she a hurricane”

One of the bestseller’s of John Green, ‘Looking for Alaska’ is a heart wrenching story of Culver Creek, also known as Miles, starting college. He enters college with great hopes because he is tired of his mundane life back at home. He goes out of city to seek a Great Perhaps. The plot is divided into two parts : before and after.

Miles, the protagonist of the first plot meets new people and befriends them soon enough. They take Miles to the social order of campus and introduce him to mischief-making, smoking cigarettes, and drinking. They had to avoid the dean whom they had named ‘Eagle’. Miles was more of a timid person, who usually got bullied around everyone else. In the first party, which Miles attends, he falls for Alaska. She is unlike everybody else, whose idiosyncrasy points out her brilliancy and her eyes sparkle with the dint of hope, for a better tomorrow.

Miles’s favourite class was religious studies, taught by an old man. He lectured all the time and made Miles think about religion, philosophy, and life. Miles loved his classes, Alaska did not. Time passes and Miles continued being obsessed about Alaska. He stayed on campus for Thanksgiving to try to get with her, but all he got for his trouble was a sense of homesickness and confusion. In between jokes and puns, the friends found out a harsh reality of Alaska’s life, her mother had died of an aneurysm right in front of her when she was eight. On one night, Alaska got a call from her boyfriend and left in a hurry.

The plot two commences with a shock, from the news of Alaska’s death. Miles is grief stricken. He goes around in search of Alaska’s whereabouts; the details of the car accident that had taken her life.  Miles tries to come to grips with who Alaska was and who he wanted her to be. In the end, Miles realises that life moves on. The realisation makes Miles and the Colonel, come to terms with their loss and grief. They give up on the quest of finding about Alaska; throwing themselves into their studies, alone. The Old Man who’s their professor assigns them a final task of how each student individually moves out of his own ‘labyrinth of suffering’. Miles, finally, gets some answers because writing brings out all his emotions. He pens down his feelings and thus gets out of his own labyrinth of suffering about Alaska.

 

Emotional Turmoil

Posted on by haywiredthoughtsandstrokes

There are times, when the world seems to be running faster than the Bulletin and falling gravely like hail in hailstorms. Nothing seems to be working the way our perceptions want them to. The melodious symphony of our thoughts and actions tunes into a harsh ear-piercing semitone and makes us realise how messed up life is turning out to be. You wish to be as quiet as the lonely bird perked on the branch and the same time, you wish to find an outlet for the bottled up feelings and scream till your mouth dries up like the Sahara.

Wisdom asks you to be patient and find a solution for the source of the conflict. Books tell you that it s a human phase and will pass away. Medicine asks you to go for therapy, but what life demands is, a confider. Human resource is in abundance in this world and so are genuine people. There are people who turn a deaf ear to their speaker, but there are others who are “all ears” when somebody is speaking. In order to crack the jackpot all you need to do is find the right listener and be a hearer too, dwell into the depths of turmoil and come back to its brink with a pure heart. Make your heart such, that a person choses your heart over an exorbitant cell phone set, to fall in love with. Today’s generation is unpredictable and thus, a woman’s greatest enemy is no more a woman but technology.brain

~ Advice of a listener.

https://d19tqk5t6qcjac.cloudfront.net/i/412.html

The Facilitator In Life

Posted on by haywiredthoughtsandstrokes

 

 

Tussled hair and cracked lenses, torn shoes with dirty shorts, grains of mud, stuck on a wrinkled shirt, was the state of the boy who sat in the back row, corner seat of the class, Drake. With teary eyes and head bent low, he was ignored and disgraced, wherever he used to go. Teachers howled at him, while the class smirked. His self-esteem had fallen below the earth. He sat on a bench, in solitude every recess, silently gulping down, half burnt sandwiches.

There came a day, when the physics teacher was finally victimized by the curses of the children. He fell seriously ill, and was advised bed rest, much to the bliss of his students. Soon came the new female physics teacher for the lads. She was successful in gripping the attention of her students not only by her beauty, but also with her words. Stories of her elegant teaching spread, like wildfire in the school. Children trotted after her, to help her with the two books she had in her hands. The teachers enviously named her as the “Pied Piper of the school”.

Fate made her the class teacher of Drake. The unique boy, who had failed her in her attempt to captivate the class and enlighten each one’s face with a smile. His disoriented look aggravated her to the core, yet left her nonplussed. True, is the story passed by generations, ‘give a lady the least attention, to grab her attention’. She saw his report card, which was scribbled with red remarks, which certainly resembled the red patches of haemoglobin. The next day, the staff room echoed with the criticizing of Drake. They all held grudges against him, since time immemorial.????????????????????????????

When she opened his previous year’s report cards, she was awestruck. His third grade report spoke highly of him. It revealed that Drake was one of the brightest boys of the class. It was a pleasure having him in the class. Grade forth report spoke of his chirpy behaviour and excellent humour, his light when fell on others, gave them an extravagant glow too. The teacher had further mentioned that his mother’s health was likely to affect his behaviour, and if he received lack of attention and love, they would have to bid adieu to the sparkly side of his.

Grade five teacher had expressed her sympathy for the child, whose mother had passed away. She wrote that along with her soul, had passed away the child’s eccentric side. Grade sixth teacher, had written down her words of reprimand for him, which seemed to be written in such wrath, that the paper had smudged at places. In a spur, she was reminded of her cruelty with the kid. The way she had sternly said words filled with rage to him, had killed the little hope which was left in him. After this enlightening moment, she changed, and so did everything else.

She showered her love upon him, treated him with motherly care and devotion. Soon arrived her birthday, when her pupils surrounded her with gifts in their hands. Among big packages with fancy ribbons was one small gift wrapped in a tattered paper box. Last of all, Drake walked up timidly to the teacher, to hand her the box, The class roared with laughter, until the teacher opened it and smiled. It contained a half used perfume bottle, a lipstick and a bracelet from which some beads had fallen off. She put on the bracelet, sprinkled the spray, and applied the lipstick, which shocked the class, but Drake’s eyes glittered. He did not have to say it loud, that these were the last pieces of his mother’s existence.

Years passed by, and she succeeded in reviving in Drake’s heart the cheerful spirit that had once existed. She enabled him to stand on his own feet.He passed out with flying colors and left for college. He was in touch with her through letters, and soon arrived the one, which made her eyes well up with tears and heart beat faster.

Dear Ma’am,

I know you must be surprised by the sudden news, that I have found my better half. It was love at first sight for me. We are getting married on the first of December. I would request you to take my mother’s place in the marriage ceremony as you are someone, who stands on the same pedestal as her for me.There exists that bond between us.

Your Loving Student,

Drake.

She held the letter and cried her heart out, after which she gently rose from her position and went to buy the necessities for the preparation of her “son’s” wedding.

 

 

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